Search Results for: blog dealing with behavior problems in public

Is Your Discipline Different in Public Than at Home?

A hundred years ago, it was common for the more financial affluent families to have a parlor or a room in their house that was not used for the family but existed merely as a place to entertain. This room was better furnished, often cleaner, and may have been the only room in the house that was really decorated since it was the public face of the family. While it would be ridiculous for me to assume that there is not a difference between how we act in public and how we act when we are in our comfortable homes … Continue reading →

One Instance Does Not Make a Behavior Problem

As a parent there are so many times when we do not know if we do are doing or saying the right thing with our kids, or whether or not they are developing bad habits or behavior problems. When I am chatting with other parents, they often express concerns at an instance that happens with their kids and worry that it is indicative of something major. I think we need to remember that one (or even two) instance does not necessarily mean something huge is going on. A temper tantrum at the supper table, or a power struggle in the … Continue reading →

Dealing With Behavior Problems In Public

It seems to be an inescapable fact of life. When you take your child out in public, he will misbehave. Even kids who are generally well-behaved seem to act out sometimes when they are in public. It’s almost like they are daring you to do something. Many parents, embarrassed by public eyes, are hesitant to discipline their kids when they are out, for fear that others will think they are “bad” parents. Then there are parents like me. I believe that whatever discipline technique I use on Tyler at home, I will use it in public. Do you often find … Continue reading →

A Completely Changed Life

After reading some of the forum posts by tmwhalens, I thought I’d share a story of lives and one marriage that has had more than the usual problems and every day hassles to overcome. Ron Brookman says when he first married he says ‘it was for all the wrong reasons.’ It was more about keeping up appearances and trying to subvert and hide his homosexuality. Ron had two children with his first wife. The marriage was dysfunctional and unhappy. After she left him, from time to time he visited places in search of a homosexual relationship. This was despite the … Continue reading →

It is Okay to Say Things Out Loud (In Fact, It Helps)

How can we solve problems and face challenges if we don’t even know what they are? Or, if we do know in the deep recesses of our minds what the problem is, but don’t actually say it out loud and get it out on the table, how can we face it, tackle it, and get on with things? It seems that in dealing with our children, or with family issues in general, often the first and hardest step is stating the problem or issue out loud so that everyone can work on it. Unstated problems have a lot of power. … Continue reading →

The Immeasurable Importance of Your Child’s Teacher

Parents, if your special needs child is struggling in school–if he or she is miserable, and if things have been rough academically, let me make a suggestion. Take a careful look at your child’s teacher. I believe your child’s teacher can literally mean the difference between a successful year or a failed one. I’ve often heard other parents of special needs kids talk about the ups and downs they faced in the public (or private) school system over the years, and there always seemed to be a correlation with whether the child “clicked” with his teacher. I’m not writing this … Continue reading →

Where On Earth Did You Get An Idea Like That?

It comes as a bit of a shock when we parents realize that we are not the only influence on our child or children. I remember being so involved and careful–setting out with the best of intentions to impart all my wisdom and direction onto the tender young minds for who’s care I had been granted responsibility. Gradually, outside influences started to infiltrate. My best-laid plans and efforts began to be assaulted and peppered with holes and attacks, I found myself shocked and horrified and saying, “Where on earth did you get an idea like that?!” There were words I’d … Continue reading →

Initial Denial of Authorization: The Letter

It’s not easy to parent a child who suffers from mental, emotional, and physical disabilities. Navigating the medical and mental health system can be a job in itself. Top things off with a less than cooperative Employer provided group health plan and life can become more then just a little stressful. Our beautiful 9-year-old daughter was placed for adoption with us at the age of 5. It’s been a long hard road filled with difficult parenting choices. I thought I knew everything after raising my older two children. Helping Makala has become the definition of Advocating for the best interest … Continue reading →

My Family Meltdown at Family Yoga

I thought I would share my teaching struggle with other parents who teach their children. Although, I’m not usually teaching my child because he goes to public school, I did have him in the Family Yoga class that I taught yesterday. I’ll start by saying that I truly respect parents who can patiently teach, coach or lead a group of kids that includes one of their own. If anyone knows what the behavioral meltdown that occurs in this situation is called, I would love to know. Something about being a yoga teacher makes me superimpose this idea that I’m supposed … Continue reading →

Using Brain-Dead Phrases To Nip Power Struggles In the Bud

For parents who find themselves constantly engaged in power struggles with their kids, I have a technique that might work for you. It’s called, Using Brain-Dead Phrases. It’s a technique recommended in the book, Try and Make Me, by Ray Levy and Bill O’Hanlon. It is a way to let your child know that you are not going to engage in arguing with them or respond to silly questions. The authors report that this is an effective alternative to ignoring behavior because for some people it’s simply not in our nature to ignore things that bug us. There are several … Continue reading →