Search Results for: blog dealing with divorce in the extended family

Dealing with the In-Laws

When there is an issue with the extended family, how you you deal with it without causing harm to or conflict within your marriage? The in-laws are and important part of your spouse’s life, which automatically makes them an important part of your life. While it isn’t always easy to have complete family harmony, it is crucial to understand the needs of the extended family and work though conflict. Work together When an issue comes up with the in-laws, you should first solve it with your spouse. Discuss the issue together and avoid accusatory statements, such as “Your mother always…” … Continue reading →

Blended and Divorced Families and Major Events—Part One

For many of us single parents, most of the time we can get away with NOT having to interact with our ex-in-laws or other extended family members on a regular basis. In fact, as the children get older—even parents who have shared custody may find that they rarely have to talk to each other. When major life events come along, however—such as a wedding, funeral, birth of a baby, or (as is my current family situation, graduation)—we are forced to have to figure out how to get along, coordinate and/or detach in order to salvage what sanity we can. I … Continue reading →

Dealing With Divorce in the Extended Family

With divorce as prevalent as it is now, it doesn’t just happen within the immediate family. Children can be affected and influenced by divorce in the extended family too–aunts and uncles, grandparents and others who go through a divorce can create a change and reorganization in how the extended family functions. While it might not feel as “every day” and immediate–there can still be issues and insecurities that crop up as a child wrestles with making sense of how a family changes as result of a divorce. In the world I grew up in, one of my sets of great-grandparents … Continue reading →

Are Things Getting Better, Worse or Staying the Same?

As a single parent, it can sometimes feel as though we are slogging along in a grand swamp and that we will never get to shore or even see the clear light of day again! I know that sounds terribly dramatic but who among us has not had those days when we wonder if we are on a treadmill and just working hard at getting nowhere? Whether you are in the midst of all of the legal proceedings of a divorce, dealing with the seemingly unending grief and loss, or trying to get ahead financially in the building of your … Continue reading →

LDS Week in Review – July 7th-12th

Welcome to our Week in Review! If you didn’t have the chance to join us every day here in LDS, here’s your opportunity to get caught up. We started off the week with “Dinner Discussions,” which helps keep us on track with our lessons. Then we had a review of Dallin H. Oaks’ conference talk on “Testimony.” Is your teen trying to decide whether or not to add seminary to his schedule? “Choose to Attend Seminary” will help him see that the blessings will be great if he’ll take that extra time to study the gospel more deeply. We continued … Continue reading →

Thinking of the Other Parent as a Business Partner

One of the best morsels of advice I received when I was going through my divorce was to learn how to think of my ex-husband and my children’s partner as a co-parent or business partner in the task of raising our children. It freed me up to reorganize my thinking and focus on the fact that we would remain connected in the process of raising the children (even if on some levels, I would rather that weren’t the case). Thinking of the Ex as a “coworker” is a great way to create a functional working relationship while sharing in the … Continue reading →

How Smooth is Your “Transfer Day?”

We call it “Transfer Day” in our household–the day of the week that the kids move from one parent’s house to the other. After several years of being a two-household family, it’s definitely gotten much smoother. In fact, in the first couple years after the divorce, when the kids were much younger–I dreaded the chaos and messy-ness of transfer day. But, over time, we’ve gotten it down and things run much more smoothly. Like many divorced/single-parent families, our custody arrangements have not stayed the same over the years. Our reality has been through many morphs and changes due mostly to … Continue reading →

Do’s and Don’ts of Single Parenting

Becoming a single parent means learning new things and fast. In addition to reading everything you can, sometimes the best (or hardest) lesson is through good, old-fashioned experience. I know as a divorced mother of two, I had to learn some pretty tough lessons through trial and error. Although I certainly don’t have all the answers, I thought I would share a few of the do’s and don’ts I discovered during my years as a single parent. For starters, you should never place your child in a position of being your peer. Sure, your child can be a friend but … Continue reading →