Hair Raising Dilemma: Who Calls the Shots in Your Family?by Michele Cheplic | More from this Blogger 17 Sep 2008 06:02 AM I didn't have to take a brush to my daughter's hair until she was nearly 2 years old. She simply didn't have enough to warrant doing so. (This is how her hair looked until she was about 19 months. Sort of.) Currently, her locks don't grace her shoulders or flow to the middle of her back like her best friend's, but she couldn't care less. Given her genetic make up she likely won't have luxuriously, thick, sleek locks that blow seductively when windswept like overpaid supermodels. Rather, she will have to make do with thin, wispy hair that struggles to stay put even with the aid of overpriced styling products. But as I mentioned, at 4-years old she is blissfully unaware of this fact... and frankly, I couldn't be happier. Here's why: Last weekend I babysat my friend's 10-year-old daughter (and her 6-year-old son) while she and her husband traveled out of state. Emma has a gorgeous mane of blonde hair that she has grown past the middle of her back. It's soft and shiny... and super high maintenance. I used to braid my hair in college, but had forgotten the time and energy it takes to upkeep long hair. In the amount of time it took for us to get Emma's hair presentable enough to go out in public on Saturday I could have completed three loads of laundry and cleaned the kitchen... twice. Did I mention that Emma doesn't like to have her hair brushed? Long story short: I skipped the braids and convinced her to settle on a simple ponytail, which stayed in place all of five minutes until she yanked it out (she claimed that she missed touching her hair). She spent the rest of the weekend peering out from under a baseball cap (her brother's suggestion). When Emma's mom returned home Sunday evening we shared a good laugh over the hair-raising experience. She then revealed that she has been trying for months to get Emma to adopt a new hairstyle. Apparently, at one point she even enlisted the help of her hairdresser, but ended up with a teary eyed child clinging on to her locks in the middle of the salon. Strike one. My pal then tried another tactic. She tried to convince her Rapunzel look-alike that her hair would actually grow faster if she got it trimmed into a neater style. No dice. Emma won't budge despite her mother's pleas. Which leads me to this question for parents whose children are highly protective of their locks: Who calls the shots regarding hairstyles in your family? Do you feel it is your duty as a parent to intervene when you child has chosen a questionable do? Or are you from the school of thought that says let the child go through with his or her choice and learn an important lesson about the consequences of impulsive actions? Related Articles: Has Becoming a Parent Made You a Better Person? Is Your Child Ready to Answer the Phone? Can You Miss Your Kids Too Much? A Mother's View from the Pool-Bikinis on Babies? A Mother's View from the Pool: Why are you Wearing Crocs in the Water? Bad Economy + Tooth Fairy = Unhappy Kids Cell Phones - How Young is Too Young? Learn more about Michele Cheplic  Michele Cheplic was born and raised in Hilo, Hawaii, but now lives in Wisconsin. Michele graduated from the University of Wisconsin-Madison with a degree in Journalism. Relevantparenting tags User Comments  Valorie Delp (49340) 17 Sep 2008 07:37 AMI let my kids pick their do's within reason. I even let my oldest use temporary dye to do her hair pink. But with that said, if I had a strong opinion--then it's my job to intervene. OTOH, my oldest has long locks and wants to keep growing them with the goal of chopping them off and donating to locks of love. In that case, I'm happy to spend time helping her groom her hair.  deedee1231 (4030) 17 Sep 2008 10:40 AMAll three of my girls have VERY long hair. Erica's hangs to the tops of her thighs and the twins have hair that reaches just below their waists. My hair doesn't even grow that long. Erica takes care of her own hair and does whatever she wants with it. It is a huge chore to wash and brush the twins hair and neither of them like getting it brushed. I do brush it out every day though, and keep it clean. I have thought about getting both their heads bobbed, but they don't want it cut so I just deal with it. swtuthmommy3 (130) 17 Sep 2008 02:08 PMMy seven year old daughter calls the shots on how her hair is done. She is another one whose curly, wispy blonde hair took at least two years to even grow 2-3 inches after my daughter was born. I have to spray my daughter's hair with detangler and use a soft brush anytime I brush her hair. At least she likes it in braids. Her hair still grows slowly, but looks nice at a little below shoulder length.  Dale Harcombe (10327) 17 Sep 2008 11:27 PMWhen our daughter was young she had thin hair and her godmother, a hairdresser, suggested it should be cut short to strengthen it. She was about 4 at the time. She wasn't happy about it. We explained why it needed to be cut so it would grow long and beautiful. It did. It's long thick and gorgeous and she's had long hair ever since. We never had any major hassles though. She always loved people combing or brushing her hair etc. She's now an adult.  Michele Cheplic (37339) 18 Sep 2008 05:21 AMMy hat's off to all of you moms who help with the upkeep of your daughter's long hair! Val--I love the Locks for love idea! deedee--I honestly don't know how you deal with double the hairwashing, and combing, and primping... amazing! swtuthmommy3--I would pay to have your daughter's curls... in fact I did years ago when I got a perm. It set me back $120!! My dd's hair is straighter than arrow. Dale--You and I have the same cut! Thanks for the comments! Valorie Delp (49340) 18 Sep 2008 08:06 AMMy twins still don't have hair. I mean they do. . .but not long hair. In fact, I have a hard time convincing people that they are 3 bc their hairs still look so babyish. But I'm in no hurry for them to look their age. ;-) Michele Cheplic (37339) 19 Sep 2008 05:11 AMI'm with you Valorie! And there's something to be said for people assuming your children are younger than they are when you are at the admission's gate of an amusement park. ;-) Community Tags Hair, hairstyles for kids, Kids, kids and hair, parents Discuss this article
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