Search Results for: blog increasing communication through parent child contracts

They May Not Hear Anything After the First Sentence

The truth with parenting (as with other relationships, I think) is that communication can be major. So much so, in fact, that I think if we master some basic, important communication skills it can go a long way in helping us establish strong relationships and bonds with our children, and help us get through some pretty sticky parent-child situations. One thing that I have learned is that if I have something important to say I should say it simply and quickly. My kids might turn in for the first sentence, but then they are very likely to just tune me … Continue reading →

Communication Breakdown? It Might Be That You are TOO MUCH Alike

Similarities with our kids can be wonderful—there is nothing like recognizing some of your most cherished personal qualities in your child and seeing how he or she takes after you. But, the thing is, they don’t just get our most cherished and best-liked personal qualities, sometimes they inherit or take on some of those things about ourselves which we aren’t too pleased with. This is where I think we can run into communication problems with our children. It isn’t always that we are so different we can’t see each other’s point of view, but sometimes, we are so much alike … Continue reading →

I Say One Thing, But They Hear Another

No matter how much I work on communication in my parenting, sometimes one of my children and I get our wires crossed. There are just those times when I hear myself saying one thing; think I am being clear, transparent and obvious–and they hear something completely different! The next thing I know, I am trying to explain myself and defend what I thought I was saying and we’ve entered some sort of twilight zone of miscommunication! Here is a perfect example: My daughter came downstairs in the midst of preparing to go to a costume party. She said to me: … Continue reading →

Getting the Teens to Talk to Me—It’s Feast or Famine

Gone are the days when my three kids would de-brief with me at the end of every day—I would hear all the details of who said what and what they ate for lunch and how they scraped their knee. It is not that my kids don’t talk to me anymore now that they are teenagers; it is just that we might go days without a peep and then I’ll get caught in the kitchen and get a real ear-full of everything that has been going on. I do get a lot of “fines” now when I ask how the kids … Continue reading →

Expressing Frustration

Here’s the thing—I have three high-school aged teenagers, each of them is one year apart in school and a little more than one year apart in age. I love them, I adore them, I am often inspired by them—but they have a regular tendency to frustrate the living daylights out of me! I would like to go on record that I think it is perfectly appropriate and healthy for a parent to be able to express her frustration at her charges and offspring now and again… According to all the experts, in all in the HOW we express ourselves to … Continue reading →

Are You Sending Crystal Clear Messages to Your Kids?

Unclear messages are the bane of communication! How often have you been at work or having a discussion with someone and feel like they are sending you mixed messages? Whether it’s passive aggressive statements and behaviors or someone seems to be “saying one thing” while doing something completely different, it can make us feel as though we are crazy or unable to properly communicate. As parents, it’s part of our job to be clear communicators when we are communicating with our children… Good, clear communication is not just what we way, but it also includes our body language, the consistency … Continue reading →