Search Results for: blog no more lies1

No Longer in Control

Reality slapped me in the face a couple of weeks ago.  The reality of being a military family that is at the mercy of their timetable. My son’s first duty station to Turkey wasn’t supposed to happen until February or March.  So needless to say it came as quite a shock to our family when the day after he graduated training from Security Forces, he called to let me know that he was leaving the next day for Turkey. As the words came out of his mouth, I nearly stopped breathing.  This was my warning, just one day?  There went … Continue reading →

Keep Conversation Natural, Not Forced

Have you ever tried to force a teenager to talk?  It’s usually not very productive, leaving both you and your teen to feel frustrated. It can also do the opposite of what you intend.  Instead of drawing you closer, it builds walls. So what’s the answer?  It is allowing conversations to happen in the natural course of events.  What happens naturally is so much sweeter than what you attempt to force. In case you are wondering what I mean by the natural course of events, let me first preface this by saying if there is something in particular going on … Continue reading →

Does Happiness Lead to More Money?

They say money can’t buy happiness.  But could it be that happiness leads to more money? Apparently new research shows that the happier a teenager is, the more money earned in adult years.  These were the findings after following more than 10,000 teens in the U.S.for 10 years. Happier teens earned 10 percent more than the average person’s salary at 29 years of age. But the less happy teens earned 30 percent less. What made this study even more interesting is that the results were the same, even after taking into account other factors such as the teen’s gender, physical … Continue reading →

The All-or-Nothing Person

I don’t know if you can relate to this, but I tend to be an all-or-nothing kind of person.  Although this can be a good trait, for the most part it stands in the way.  This is especially true with fitness.  Thankfully I am learning to overcome this mentality. Here is what the all-or-nothing person looks like.  You intend to start up an exercise program on Monday.  But something happens and your schedule for the day gets screwed up. The all-or-nothing person’s response isn’t “I will just start on Tuesday.”  No, they decide to wait until the following Monday. Here … Continue reading →

I’m Not You

“I’m not you!” Why did those words sting a bit? It felt like my teen daughter was trying to let me know that she had no desire to be me…as if maybe there was something wrong with that? The reality is that my daughter wanted me to stop judging her. And she was right. She isn’t me. This was part of a painful conversation that we had several months ago, in the midst of what I can only call a tsunami of problems. Suddenly that close relationship we had was being rocked. And part of the problem was the fact … Continue reading →

Asking, Not Telling

Communication with a teen can sometimes be a daunting and frustrating task. How many times have I heard, “Stop yelling at me”? When my volume isn’t really as high as my teen is making it out to be. Or the way I say something can be totally misconstrued. No matter how much I try to “fix” my teen’s interpretation, they have heard what they believe they have heard and nothing is going to change that. I am always looking for ways to improve communication with my teens. Much of this depends on their personality. For instance, there are certain tones … Continue reading →

You Just Never Know

It has been one of “those” mornings. My youngest son woke up late and put the rest of the family behind. When we should have been walking out the door, same child was trying to quick finish something for school. Because we left later, there was much more traffic at the school to deal with. That meant more opportunities to be cut off, passed or to wait in the very long drop off line. Needless to say this also resulted in my day getting set back. You would think my mood would be sour. Normally my daughter would have been … Continue reading →

When Weight Enters Politics

I am by no means one of those persons that like to jump on the political bandwagon.  I have my own opinions, which aren’t usually shared. But I have to admit that I am quite disturbed over the fact that someone’s weight has become a political issue.  I am talking about New Jersey governor, Chris Christie. There is some belief that he may be getting ready to run in the next election.  If that’s true, I hope he is ready for things to get real personal.  Because that is how our society tends to handle politics…it gets down deep into … Continue reading →

Scripted Romance

Many years ago I let my husband off the hook—the one where he gets hung up for failing to come through on Valentine’s Day.  I used to have lots of expectations until I began to realize something….his love for me is shown on a daily basis.  So why expect him to do something extravagant one day a year? Now, I’m not knocking those couples who go all out for Valentine’s Day.  Maybe it’s the fact we’ve been married for more than two decades or it could be we have grown too comfortable—who knows? I just know that my husband feels … Continue reading →

Give Yourself the Gift of Love This Valentine’s Day

Most of us associate Valentine’s Day with the receiving or giving of gifts to others.  How about making this year one about giving the greatest gift of all?  I’m talking about a gift that begins with you…loving yourself enough to make some important lifestyle changes. Now that the New Year isn’t feeling so new anymore, many of us start to lose grip on the goals and resolutions we set.  The energy and enthusiasm we felt in the beginning of the year to exercise more and eat less has started to wane. In fact, some people might even be suffering from … Continue reading →