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Not-So Safe Side of Strolling

Summer is the perfect time to load your child in a stroller and enjoy Mother Nature. Sadly, it only takes a few minutes for a relaxing stroll to go south if you don’t take a few basic precautions, such as: *Buckling up your child with a five-point harness *Not letting older siblings run while pushing the stroller *Not putting excessive weight in the stroller’s basket *Making sure to employ the stroller’s brakes after you park it And last, but not least, not letting your baby wear his expensive bling on a stroller ride lest he get mugged. I wish I … Continue reading →

Cupcake War

I’ve been known to indulge in a cupcake or two… or six, at times. Typically, I follow the splurge with a few miles on the treadmill or an extra-long bike ride. Not exactly the healthiest of patterns, but it supports the philosophy that in order to avoid packing on the pounds you need to burn more calories than you consume. Interestingly, that simple equation is at the center of a controversial ban being implemented in Massachusetts public schools. Beginning August 1st, the state is no longer allowing bake sales to take place on school grounds. In addition, Massachusetts is unveiling … Continue reading →

Hitting Parents Where It Hurts

I scream. You scream. I scream even louder, and you may too if you have to decide between paying your utility bill and buying your kid an ice cream cone this summer. If you thought the price of gas was high, consider paying double what you are shelling out now for a single scoop of vanilla ice cream. According to news sources, your child’s favorite dessert could put you in the poor house due to what is being called a “crisis” in the global crop of vanilla pods. This “crisis” has reportedly prompted some people to stockpile vanilla pods causing … Continue reading →

I Scream

You will too after reading about a select group of upscale New York parents who thinks the world begins and ends in their little corner of Brooklyn. Yes, Park Slope parents are making national headlines again for yet another insanely absurd interpretation of one of life’s most basic rites of passages. I guess that’s what happens when you have big bucks and don’t have to take four modes of public transportation to three different part-time jobs that barely help you keep a roof over your kids’ heads and food on the table. Rich people problems; where do I sign-up for … Continue reading →

Parents Against Ice Cream

Not just any ice cream, Ben and Jerry’s newest flavor: Schweddy Balls. Don’t let the name fool you, the limited edition ice cream doesn’t include the stench of perspiration. However, it does feature balls. Not those kind. Regardless, a conservative parent group doesn’t like the sound, taste or insinuation of Schweddy Balls and it wants you to hate the frozen treat too. The group, dubbed One Milllion Moms, is asking parents around the world to boycott the ice cream with the fetid sweat name. “The vulgar new flavor has turned something as innocent as ice cream into something repulsive,” the … Continue reading →

Bald and Beautiful

(My Michelin Man baby) My daughter was bald and beautiful for the first two years of her life. During that time I never once stuck a single pink bow on her noggin or dared place a bedazzled scalp-constricting headband around her halo of peach fuzz. This, despite the fact that my roly-poly, precious baby GIRL was regularly mistaken for a BOY. While other members of my family couldn’t stand that people thought my daughter was a boy, I wasn’t fazed in the least when strangers couldn’t properly identify her gender. There was no way that I was going to place … Continue reading →

Chubby Babies Don’t Make Desirable Cover Models

In my opinion there’s nothing more delicious than a marshmallow-cheeked baby with Michelin Man arms and chunky monkey thighs. Unfortunately, my penchant for chubby infants is one of the reasons why I would never make it as a magazine editor in Britain. Fortunately, I would rather mother butterball babies than edit photos of them, so I’m not too broken up about my fate. However, there are plenty of parents on both sides of the Atlantic who are irate about re-touched photos of plump tots being featured on the covers of international glossies. According to reports, several British parenting magazines have … Continue reading →

Chubby Babies: Cute or Dangerous?

My daughter was a chunk as a baby. And by chunk, I mean move over Butterball, there’s a new big bird in town. Just look at her: (Count the rolls: My daughter at 6 months.) Much of her girth can be attributed to the fact that during the first six months of her life she was connected to my breasts 24/7. (She was connected 18/7 until she was about 16 months old.) My little plumpy was an eating machine… and she had the figure to prove it. At six months she was in the 95th percentile for weight. (I thought … Continue reading →