Teasing

by Kori Rodley Irons | More from this Blogger

27 May 2007 06:08 AM

Teasing and childhood seem to go hand in hand. Whether it is siblings teasing and pestering each other or peers and playmates teasing--this activity can be anywhere from light-hearted fun to very traumatic and life-altering. It can be a challenge for parents to get a handle on teasing and make sure it stays in the fun category. While we may not be able to control what other children do at school or in the neighborhood, we can help our child learn to cope with teasing, as well as NOT be someone who engages in inappropriate or hurtful teasing behaviors.

Understanding motivation is an important developmental step for children. Teasing that is intended to be hurtful or to put someone else down, make themselves feel better, or express hostility, resentment, jealousy, etc. are all forms of teasing that children should be encouraged to refrain from. Ask a child who is teasing "Why?" and mirror back what you see as happening. Most young children won't know why they are teasing someone else and it is only through repeated modeling and a focus on self-awareness that they will start to recognize the motives behind their teasing. Many children just "pick it up" from their peers and it becomes a way to fit in and deflect attention off themselves. Siblings, who tend to be constantly battling for attention and know each other so intimately as to know all flaws and buttons--can be the worst offenders of painful and negative teasing. As children become more aware of their own motivations, they can develop understanding of what is motivating other children and this can help make them more resistant and resilient to teasing by others.

Parents can also watch their own teasing behaviors. Having a well-developed sense of humor means being able to laugh at oneself and find humor in things that are NOT at someone else's expense. If you are constantly making fun, poking fun, teasing and mocking other people--you are showing your child that this is what it means to have a sense of humor and that it is okay to laugh at other people's expense. Teasing may seem like a natural part of childhood, but teaching what is appropriate and inappropriate behavior is an important parental task.

See Also: Helping Your Child Recognize Bullying

Teaching Your Child Relationship Boundaries

Learn more about Kori Rodley Irons

Bio has been removed by administrator

View Full Profile | More from this Blogger