Search Results for: blog the pain of watching our kids struggle

Can You Tell When Your Child is Faking It?

Does your son typically complain of a stomachache on spelling test Fridays? Or do notice that your daughter usually begins hacking up a lung on the Monday following a long weekend spent partying with friends? Unless a child has the obvious symptoms of a bad flu-—high temp, chills, projectile vomiting—-then parents are often left to use their own instincts to weed out the fakers from the truly feverish. In some cases it can be a tricky task. My own daughter has been sick with a bad cold for nearly two weeks. However, this is a child who is so deathly … Continue reading →

It can be a GOOD Thing we can’t Change our Kids

I can get as frustrated as the next parent that my children will not just settle down and do what I want them to. After all, I just KNOW that I often know what is best for them and I am convinced that if they would just listen to me and change—they would be happier individuals. I could save them so much pain and suffering. Of course, I imagine that my own mother probably felt the same way and parents have been trying to steer and change their children forever. There must be a reason that we really cannot change … Continue reading →

The Pain of Watching Our Kids Struggle

While there is plenty of joy, pleasure and delight in parenting—especially as we watch our children stretch and grow and blossom into their own individual people, there is also some struggle and pain. I think one of the most painful thing for many parents is not what happens to us, but the pain and suffering we endure as we watch our children have to struggle and face some of life’s challenges… I know in my head that I cannot protect my children from everything or make their lives an easy, cushy walk in the park. I even know intellectually that … Continue reading →

When Friends Judge Your Kids (or Your Parenting)

Everybody is an expert, right? Especially when it comes to parenting (or work, housekeeping, dating, marriage, etc.)! Actually, I’m being a little over-the-top, here, but the reality is that as parents, we are sometimes in the position of feeling judged by family and friends. In my own situation now, my kids are no longer cute. In fact, they can be downright snarky, unpleasant, gangly, and rude. They are teenagers, for goodness sake. Of course, I also think they are amazing and fascinating and energizing and I am enjoying watching them struggle and evolve into individual adults. I do have some … Continue reading →

Sesame Street Lends a Hand to Cash-Strapped Parents

My preschooler loves watching Sesame Street, but honestly, the summer reruns are killing me. Seriously, if I have to hear Telly Monster lament about his missing triangle one more time I may reconsider Dish Network’s recent offer to hook me up with cheap satellite TV. Fortunately, I may not have to dig deep to preserve my sanity. Yesterday, the folks who produce Sesame Street announced that new episodes of the Emmy Award-winning children’s show will begin airing next month. What’s more, the new season includes a special show dedicated to the economy. If you haven’t already discussed the current financial … Continue reading →

“Jon and Kate Plus 8”: Misery Loves Company

Does it ever… If you tuned into watch the Gosselin’s martial meltdown of TLC’s “Jon and Kate Plus 8” on Monday night you weren’t alone. According to reports, the season premiere of “Jon and Kate Plus 8” was watched by a record breaking 9.8 million people. To put that number into perspective consider that the premiere of ABC’s “Lost” attracted just over 7 million viewers. The number is also on par with the finale of “Sex and the City,” which aired five years ago. The ratings for Monday’s “Jon and Kate” were the highest in TLC’s history. Not only did … Continue reading →

Do as I Say, Not as I Do

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“Do as I say, not as I do.” How many times did we hear something like that when we were growing up? Both parents and teachers have used that one. The problem with that line of thinking is clearly illustrated with another axiom: “what you do speaks so loudly that I can’t hear what you say.” Modeling the behavior we desire from our children is critical in helping to teach our kids good habits, and the moral values we want to pass on to them. My old pastor used to say, “More is caught than taught” when it comes to … Continue reading →

Helping Where They Are the Most Vulnerable

Our kids need our attention and help for all sorts of things. Sure, we need to make sure they are clothed and fed and educated and all those other basic needs, but we also need to be able to see where our children struggle the most; where they are the most vulnerable, and give them extra support, encouragement and resources around those areas. This parenting reality might be really clear if a child has an illness, allergy, or learning disability–but it really does carry over to other aspects of life as well. If a child has a hard time making … Continue reading →

Brain Fitness – Defensive Pessimism

I ran across the phrase defensive pessimism in a magazine recently and as I read the description of it, I found myself staring at it and being amazed. You see, because the description I read – was myself to a tee. When confronted with a crisis, we often talk about looking at the worst possible outcome. In defensive pessimism, you take looking at the worst possible outcome a step further. You examine every detail of what could go wrong and how you would in turn respond to it. Two weeks ago, my husband went into the hospital in extreme pain … Continue reading →