Search Results for: blog who are you supposed to be today teenagers and identity

Single Parenting and Your Growing Child: It is Time for the Talk

Single parenting, oh the joys! Another job that we cannot pawn off on anyone else and that is “The Talk”. It helps if you are divorced in this case and the other parent is involved, but what if there is no other parent? Yes, I am afraid to tell you, you are it, again. Talking to your kids about growing up is probably one of the least favorite things that you will do as a parent. It is not too uncomfortable for the parent, but it is usually uncomfortable for the child. Because it is uncomfortable for them, we are … Continue reading →

See, I Told You So!

Recently, I had one of those parenting moments that made me smile. My oldest son (age 16) came home with a haircut. I had not pushed the idea of a haircut, but told him if he wanted to get job it would be a good idea. He really resisted the whole haircut thing and has gone jobless for months. Slowly, all of his friends were getting haircuts, and he decided to take the plunge. I hardly recognized him after he got the haircut. He looked 5 years older. He also looked taller – he doesn’t have to slouch to be … Continue reading →

Who Am I? The Task of the Teenager

We think we know our children. In fact, sometimes I am convinced that I know my three teenagers better than they know themselves. But, the truth is they are morphing in front of my eyes. Their identity is not fixed and is actually quite fluid as they struggle and work at figuring out who they are and what sort of adults they want to be. Maybe answering the question, “Who Am I?” is never completely accomplished. I know that I am constantly re-evaluating who I am, what I stand for, and what purpose my life has. But, I really see … Continue reading →

Why Not Blame Mom?

There are plenty of things that I DO have control over in my little world, but, alas, far fewer things than my teenagers would actually like to think I have control over. When in doubt, blame mom! It’s all mom’s fault that the hot water heater has run out of hot water after two long teenage-showers, it’s mom’s fault that the store was out of someone’s favorite brand of cereal or type of bread, and it’s certainly mom’s fault that someone didn’t get up on time and missed the bus to school. Who else, really? Who else, but mom? My … Continue reading →

When a Child Changes or Rejects a Name

We spend a lot of time picking out our children’s names. We pour over baby name books, search our favorite names from literature, movies, sports, and try various versions of first and middle names before we settle on just the perfect moniker. Alas, these kids come with minds and personalities of their own and it is not unusual for a child to change, adjust or reject their name as they grow and evolve and take on something they feel suits them better. Some kids have been known to change their name a few times before settling on the name or … Continue reading →

When In Doubt…Read the Newspaper

I know newspapers are going out of style–especially with the younger set. But, I still take the paper. I love opening my front door in the quiet, chilly, still-dark hours of the morning and pulling the paper off my front stoop. I bring it in while the coffee is drip, drip, dripping on the kitchen counter and wrap the rubber band I’ve just removed onto our dingy family rubber band ball and know that whatever else happens during the day, I’ll have a few snippets of “news” to use for starting conversations. Talking to teenagers is tough. Don’t let anyone–Mr. … Continue reading →

Tattoos, Piercings, and Mohawks (Oh, My)

I’ve mentioned before that we don’t have a lot of extreme personal fashion going on around here. I’m not sure exactly why not considering I totally prepared myself for WHATEVER when it came to teen fashion statements. That might be why we don’t–no need to shock mom (or their father) since the parents just “don’t go there.” But–I sure do see other parents’ teenagers around town all decked out in their colorful and bejeweled finery. Ever the practical person, I’m wondering 1. who is paying for all those tattoos and piercings–does it come out of allowances, part-time jobs, birthday gift … Continue reading →

Are Single Sex Classes the Solution?

Same sex or single sex classes refer to classes that are made up of either all boys or all girls. Are same sex classes a solution to educating today’s children? Because some private schools believe single sex classrooms are successful, more public schools are looking into it. Large cities such as New York (with nine single sex public schools), Chicago, Dallas, Settle, and Washington D.C. have started a trend. Recently a Milwaukee School Board also approved the addition of a single sex school to its education system. Other cities considering the addition are Miami, Atlanta, and Cleveland. Nationally, there are … Continue reading →

I’m Innocent – At Least This Time!

As you all may know, I am a high school teacher. My students qualify for special education and many of them are involved in gangs. Most of them have been labeled all of their life and to be honest, they have earned most of the labels they have. They have seen their share of fights and are not good at backing down. Push them into a corner and they will come out swinging. Now, when my students break the rules, I am all for punishing them. Trust me, they are no strangers to punishment. They are actually pretty much used … Continue reading →

Who Are You Supposed to Be Today? Teenagers and Identity

Around the time my kids solidly entered the middle school years, I started finding snippets of paper all over my house with various signatures on them. My daughters would try out different ways of writing their names with different handwriting, nicknames, versions of their own names, etc. It hit me that we were really in the age of the teenage identity crisis and I wasn’t at all sure I was ready for it–like I could stop it if I tried! Over the years, I’ve witnessed various hair styles, handwriting, speech patterns (ugh!), styles of dressing, friends, activity choices and ideas … Continue reading →