Would You Allow Your Child to Wear a Purity Ring?by Michele Cheplic | More from this Blogger 06 Dec 2008 05:25 AM The Jonas Brothers wear them. So do some of the teens from "High School Musical." Heck, there was even a point when Britney Spears sported one (what a joke). I'm referring to those mega-popular purity rings. The small silver rings are worn by young people to signify their commitment to abstinence. In other words the ring is supposed to help kids say, "I don't," before they say "I do." The rings are part of an Evangelical Christian movement to encourage teens to make a "pledge of chastity." According to my research, a father, who was outraged to discover that his hometown of Yuma, Arizona had the highest teenage pregnancy rate in the state, initiated the movement back in 1996. Since then millions of teens around the world have jumped on the purity ring bandwagon. Some rings are engraved with the words: "Love Waits." While others bear the Bible passage: "God wants you to be holy, so you should keep clear of all sexual sin. Then you will control your body and live in holiness and honor." The problem is the sliver of silver doesn't always work the way its designer had hoped. According to researchers at Yale University, a recent study showed that 88% of purity ring wearers had sex before marriage. So, would you encourage your child to wear a purity ring? One mother in the UK did, and now she and her daughter are making headlines around the world. Apparently, not everyone is gung-ho about teens sporting the chastity bands. According to news reports, when 12-year-old Kioni Lansbury donned her purity ring to school she was ordered to remove it. Lansbury's school in Ottery St. Mary in the UK has a strict no-jewelry policy. School administrators say rings pose a health hazard in science and physical education classes. However, the school's ban on rings didn't sit well with the Lansbury's who maintain the dress code allows Muslim students to wear banned headscarves, therefore an exception should be made for students who desire to publicly declare their commitment to abstinence by wearing a ring. Kioni told local news reporters that she plans to continue wearing her ring to school, but will remove it in situations where it might be dangerous. Meanwhile, the girl's mother says she stands by her daughter 100%. As a parent, what would you have done in this situation? Related Articles: Purses, Parents, and Principals School Scarf Controversy = Irate Parents Parents Confused After Daughter Gets Booted from the Girl Scouts "Too Young" Grandma Gets Shafted at Toy Store Desperate Dad vs. Unsympathetic Electric Company Parents Coming to Their Children's Defense A Father's Touching Tribute to His Infant Son Has Becoming a Parent Made You a Better Person? Can You Miss Your Kids Too Much? Learn more about Michele Cheplic  Michele Cheplic was born and raised in Hilo, Hawaii, but now lives in Wisconsin. Michele graduated from the University of Wisconsin-Madison with a degree in Journalism. Relevantparenting tags User Comments Samual (11722) 06 Dec 2008 05:52 AMAs a teacher she wouldn't be allowed to wear the ring in any of my lessons just as a student wouldn't be allowed to wear a bracelet which apparently claimed something equally ludicrous like the bracelet will stop him/her from every drinking alcohol. If Mikey wanted to do something against the schools rules I would never stick by him in that, thats like saying its ok to break the law if Mummy says yes.  Valorie Delp (49340) 06 Dec 2008 05:53 AMI agree with the mom. . .especially in light of the fact that if Muslim students are allowed to wear certain items out of respect for their religious beliefs, then Christians should be allowed to as well. To answer your blog's title--yes, our children will get purity rings (even beore the Jonas brothers wore them) and if there is a purity ball nearby when they are that age--the girls will do that with dad in lieu of prom. They will get their rings on the 12th birthday along with certain tasks to complete towards womanhood or manhood. ;-)  drnewmom (307) 06 Dec 2008 07:19 AMMuslim students wear their clothing for religious belifs ... a purity ring has nothing to do with religion. Yeah, they might have been introduced by a religious man for his community, but it is not a token of religion. If rings are against the school rules, why not put on a chastity belt? Those are making a comeback, too. Oh wait, then no one else (in theory) would see them. She can always wear the ring outside of school. I'm not really against the idea of the ring, but school rules should be followed. Oh, to answer the question directly, I would have had my daughter follow the rules, maybe having her wear the ring on a chain around her neck as a compromise while at school.  Michele Cheplic (37339) 06 Dec 2008 09:58 AMI hope when my dd is 12 she isn't the least bit interested in sex, purity rings or anything else having to do with the Jonas Brothers ;-). A mom can dream, right?!  Andrea Hermitt (5507) 06 Dec 2008 02:57 PMMy daughter is 12. She find it insulting that anyone should think she has sexual thoughts at this age. I think for her maybe 13 or 14 is a more appropriate age for a purity ring... but I am not as strict to say that she would go to a purity ball in opposed to a prom. I think she should do both. If my daughter wore a purity ring and if she went to school, which she does not, I would have a problem with her being asked to remove it. Valorie Delp (49340) 07 Dec 2008 05:23 AMDr. Newmom your sarchasm is pretty offensive. And yeah--to some of us a purity ring actually is a "Christian" symbol--an item worn out of respect for our religious beliefs. She can take it off when it is deemed dangerous like gym class. But for us (I really can't speak for this girl or anyone else who wears them) that ring will be given during a 'rite of passage' ceremony. Sounds like something worn out of religious beliefs to me? Andrea--you are much closer to this age than we are. . .so maybe I'll change my mind later? ;-) But for us at least, purity rings are also a committment to staying pure in all things--that includes dating--which we will not/don't encourage/allow, what you watch on television, as well as physical contact with the opposite sex. So at 12, it's not, "Don't go have sex," it's "What does it mean to make every thought captive in obedience to Christ, to think on things that are good, lovely, and pure. . .etc." It's a reminder, commitment, etc. that keeping your heart pure is not just about not having sex. Not suggesting you should give your daughter one earlier. . .just expanding on my above comments. ;-) Valorie Delp (49340) 07 Dec 2008 05:25 AMOh Samual--I don't know how I missed your comment earlier! ;-) The world is right again! To me it's a religious equality thing--but otherwise I would agree--even on rules that I think are stupid. Valorie Delp (49340) 07 Dec 2008 09:38 AMWell they're not endangering themselves in gym class like the students are. ;-) Although I suppose since rules are rules then the teachers--especially females who might have a diamond or similar stone--must take off their wedding ring to teach. Samual (11722) 07 Dec 2008 03:13 PMAt our school you actually have your wedding ring measured before your allowed to wear it! Same for the students who are married too.Engagement rings aren't allowed at all.  deedee1231 (4030) 07 Dec 2008 06:03 PMNo promise rings here. I don't think the students who are wearing them should be forced to take them off during school, though. I agree that student dress codes and school uniform policies should be upheld, but within reason. I think students should be able to wear one or two things that define who they are, as long as it is nothing flamboyant or distracting. drnewmom (307) 07 Dec 2008 08:33 PMValorie, I'm sorry if you were offended by my sarcasm. Maybe I should clarify myself. Muslim women are directed by their religion to cover themselves. Christians are directed by their religion to be pure, in thought and in action. They are not directed to wear a ring proclaiming such purity to the world. Living one's life according to God's direction is more important than a piece of jewelry. As Michele pointed out, the rings are "mega-popular" ... does that not cheapen their effectiveness as a symbol? If more than half of the kids who have worn a purity ring have had sex before marriage, what does that say of the teens' promise (and the rings themselves)?  QueenAngie Central Illinois, USA |
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